Funny little contradictions

I've been noticing some contradictions here in Deutschland that I thought I might air out. Partly because they are funny and partly for therapy. The biggest incongruence that I and the few other Americans that I know in Hamuburg all agree on is this weird greeting ritual. If you've read a sampling of earlier blog entries, it won't come as news that the folks in northern Germany are reserved to say the very least. The average person will most likely absolutely ignore you on the streets of Hamburg. They might even go so far as to give you a dirty look if you try to appear friendly. A German friend of ours was shocked when we told him that David and I will often smile at people on the street. Our friend's response was an emphatic 'Don't do that! They probably think you are making fun of them.' So it was with a fair degree of confusion that I received my first greeting from a stranger. And my second. And third.

Mind you, the stranger greeting is only in certain very well defined situations (how very German). In the doctors office and the gym locker room are guaranteed 'greeting' places. I went to the doctor's office a couple of months ago for lower back pain (too many years hunched at a computer, it turns out) and as I sat in the waiting room, I noticed that every single person who entered or left the room ritualistically greeted the patients-in-waiting: 'Hallo' on the way in and 'Tschuss' (sounds like 'shoes') on the way out. Every person, every time. Weird. A few weeks later I joined the gym and it happened again while I was changing. An aerobics class was letting out and as all the ladies filtered into the locker room, I was unwaveringly greeted by them all. Funnier still was that the last few ladies to enter the locker room were IN the same class with the majority of the people they were greeting. Hmmm. Of course on the way out, every single person gave a hearty 'Tschuss!' I just looked around, totally confused.

Side note - this departing greeting 'Tschuss' sounds a little like 'Cheers' and 'Shoes' had a baby and is typically stretched into two syllables and nearly sung by women. It sounds like 'Choo-oos!'

I am quietly protesting the entry greeting and have only recently begun to sing 'Tschuss!' when I leave the room - mostly because it is fun to say.

Another oddity (in my opinion) is that you can't buy a damn thing on Sunday that doesn't come from gas station (only open until 6pm), but you can get a beer whenever you want. When ever you want. The party district of Hamburg doesn't meaningfully close on the weekends but the grocery stores close at 8pm (7 on Saturday). What gives there? I mean, I am in nearly full support of everyone having Sunday off. Although, I secretly think that the reason everything is closed on Sunday is because about 80% of the adult population is nursing a woozy of a hangover come Sunday morning. I am occasionally living proof.

There is also sort of a disconnect between how liberal Germans are on one hand (beer drinking allowed anywhere, nudity is ok, dogs are almost always welcome) and how closely everyone follows the rules (waiting interminably at a 'don't walk' sign even though there is absolutely no traffic as far as you can see - just in case).

But for all of the German idiosyncrasies, I really do like a lot about this country. It's like a higher social order - work/life balance, good social programs, lots of organic food, low crime, generous vacation. So, what they heck. I'll enjoy my beer at 5am on Sunday morning and curse Sunday afternoon that I can't buy flour.

As always, I still love Hamburg!